Strap-on Play : Where to Start

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If you’re interested in purchasing a strap-on for the first time, it may be hard to know where to start.

Here are some things to consider before making your big purchase.

Will this toy be worn just by you, or both you and a partner? 

If the answer is yes, and you’re sharing a strap-on, decide if the same style harness is ideal for both your bodies. An ill-fitting harness can turn a hot, sweaty sex-perience into an awkward fumble. 

Here are Wet For Her’s best recommendations for choosing harnesses for your next hot date with strap-on play in the itinerary.

Shop Around For Harnesses

Joque harness on a model

SpareParts Hardwear creates some of the best harnesses on the market. Their Joque design is highly adjustable, making it a great choice for couples or newcomers. This harness holds the strap-on tight against your body, offering more control to the wearer. 

There are multiple adjustment points, and once you’ve tailored the Joque to your body, it can be quickly put on or removed via the velcro waistband. The velcro waistband doesn’t affect your other adjustments and leaves the other straps just where you want them.

Heading out for a hot night? 

Underwear style harnesses offer the comfort of clothing with added benefits! There is a range of styles for whatever is most comfortable for you. The Tomboi boxer or brief harnesses are perfect for those with a masculine or androgynous style. If you prefer the sexy lingerie aesthetic, try the Sasha or Bella

The looser fit offered by boxer-brief styles can create a sensation of movement and friction against the wearer. However, some folks prefer loose styles over a tighter-fitting harness, and that’s okay too!

Underwear-style harnesses have fewer (if any) straps or adjustment points. Less adjustability means they’re intuitive to use. But, these styles might be difficult to share if you and your partner have different body types. 

If you’re seeking a harness with a little extra room, our plus-size harness selection offers sexy strap-on options for bodies with extra fluff. Check out our blog post devoted to plus-sized pussies for specific recommendations.

Many harness styles offer a small pocket (or two!) for bullet vibes that add sensation for both the wearer and receiver. All of the lesbian harnesses we carry have adjustable o-rings that will accommodate multiple dildo sizes. 

However, if you find your dildo of choice needs extra stability, the Spareparts Hardwear Stabilizer is what you need. This stabilizer will offer support for heavier dildos or those with narrow shafts that can turn or slip out during play.

Another great option is the BumpHer, which can be affixed to the base of any dildo and provides cushion and stimulation for the wearer while also adding stability.

Inclusive Orgasms For All Genders

 gay pride flag and a trans flag

Anyone can incorporate strap-on play into their sex lives. However, for transgender and other gender non-conforming individuals, discovering the perfect harness and dildo combination can be exceptionally empowering.

If you or your lover experience dysphoria related to your lower bits, having this body-affirming tool in the bedroom can increase confidence and overall sexual gratification.

Wet For Her offers realistic dildos and packers with the transmasculine community in mind. Soft packers can be fun for gender play or daily wear and can be worn with any harnesses in our shop. But the Pete Freestyle harness is specifically designed for comfortable and stealthy all-day wear paired with soft packers or STPs.

Keep It Clean, So You Can Play Dirty

Women laughing in bed together

A good strap-on harness is an investment, so it’s important to care for yours properly in order to ensure a long lifetime of play. 

All the Wet For Her harnesses are machine-washable or can be hand-washed with hot water and gentle soap or sex toy cleaner. Pay extra attention to any folds in the material where fluid could get trapped. After washing, be sure to air dry to maintain the integrity of the fibers.

There are no wrong or right choices regarding which dildo and harness pairing is the right one for you. As long as it feels good and works effectively, it’s the right fit for your body. So, find the toy that turns you on and get to thrusting!